This comment was left by a gentleman in response to a video I'd posted on my YouTube channel. The original video along with this and other comments can be found here. Notice whether or not you find that his story and perspective resonate with you.
"(Pete), I was recently married for barely 4 months. We got married and I thought this woman was everything I wanted and more. I had no idea she felt uncomfortable about getting married. She never told me, and when I asked several times if this is what she wanted, she simply said YES. I gave up my job, my car, my home, my entire life in the USA to be with her in Switzerland.
I sacrificed much of my own independent life to make this move with her. Everything seemed to be going well, so i thought.. Until one day she came to me and told me the truth about how she felt about me and our marriage. I was "too soft" of a guy.. I never did find out what she meant by me being "weak", but to me i thought the same about her...
She gave up on our marriage and refused to talk it out. She made me move back to america knowing that I had nothing to go back to. She was not ready to be committed yet, I had wasted my time and I had trusted her word that she wanted this. Turned out I was wrong... I never did find out what I did wrong or why this decision came so sudden...I tried and her only reply was that "I wouldn't understand"...
Some men are afraid to talk to women, simply because of how they rejected and perceived. Sometimes it's a total embarrassment and humiliation. men sometimes feel they can't stand up to the woman who is walking all over them, because maybe that woman doesn't listen very well to what the man has to say and when he tries to talk about it, he gets shot down.. I think both sexes can be weak.. not just men... It shows in my story I told you. I showed my wife the courage and commitment to her, through ANYTHING, and she gave that up because she perceived me as "weak"...
Today i have to start over in my life and move past that kind of comment. because what did she know? She refused to listen when I was being the strength of the relationship. I'm sorry but I can't agree 100% with these videos depicting why women can't stand weak men. I think weakness is just as you said, lack of courage and being too scared to do anything.. But we still get called weak when we do stand up... Don't we?"
Emanuelle, thank you for having the courage to share your story. Now here comes some nasty medicine that I'm offering you from a place of love ...
Your ex perceived you as weak because you were being weak.
The truth - as painful as this might be to confront - is that your actions actually left her no choice but to leave you. I'm very sorry that you had to learn such a lesson the hard way. But knowing where you went wrong and taking responsibility (in other words, giving up acting like you were a powerless victim in this situation) will save you from making this kind of painful error in the future.
When a man makes the terrible mistake of abandoning himself to chase after a woman - and moreover, frames it like he's "sacrificing" for her benefit, that basic vibration of inauthenticity communicates one thing loud and clear .... she can't trust you.
And if you allow yourself to be seduced into blaming her, you'll be giving away all of your power to change your future outcomes.
Remember that the only way to reclaim our power in any situation where we've given it away is by taking full responsibility - both for the part we played in the situation and for the inauthentic way we showed up in life.
As always, let me know if you require any further guidance. My entire purpose for being here is to assist you in reconnecting with your most powerful, authentic and charismatic self.
Contact me by email send me a message on my contact page.
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